Ode to Commode

… Penned on the occasion of a catastrophic split in the toilet tank.

I thee bestow this simple ode;

O’ humble vilipend commode,

While stays the watch and bears the load

Expects no due nor nod bestowed.

Iron horse in porcelain wrapper,

Bright argent lever, raven flapper,

Expiator, refuse trapper,

Yet butt of jokes, is humble crapper.

Rigid stands in ready station

To flush impious execration,

Entitled prigs drop rude donation

Demanding instant transformation.

Tis drought makes water treasured more

And so we must be taught our error.

To prove your plight and even the score

You split that we may sit no more.

We now with clenched knees regret

Our insolence and vow to let

No daily void from bowel emit

Devoid due honor, our fair toilet.